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SMOKE+MIRRORS N.A. TOUR: CHICAGO AND FINDING OUT I WAS PREGNANT

Back with another Tour post from the Smoke + Mirrors North American Tour!

Our couple days in Chicago ended up being pretty memorable. First of all, our hotel (photographed below) was baller and located in a super posh neighborhood. Secondly, we were there over my favorite person's (eh hem, Wayne's) birthday. And thirdly, WE FOUND OUT I WAS PREGNANT WITH WOLFIE!!

The exact details of the trip are hazy because I was in a bit of shock but I will try and put together a timeline as best I can. If I remember right, our day off was the day before Wayne's birthday so that is when we celebrated with a big dinner. During the day, my friend, Aja and I ran over to a Forever 21 to find inexpensive dresses for that night since all we brought for tour were casual/comfy clothes and the restaurant seemed to be fancy. I can't remember the name of the neighborhood we stayed in but it seemed like it was where most the nice shopping is located. The streets are narrow and the buildings are charming, if that makes it any more clear to anyone. That night, a big group of got together to celebrate and it was so much fun and not to mention delicious. After the meal, we all walked back through the streets to the hotel which is my favorite thing to do in big cities.

The next day (Wayne's actual B-day), he had an obligation around noon so I hung back at the hotel with the babe. When I put River down for a nap, I had this adrenaline-pumping feeling that I needed to take a pregnancy test. It was raining outside and when I say raining, I mean pouring but there was a CVS directly across the street from the hotel so I thought, what the hell. I know I won't be winning mother of the year but as soon as River fell asleep, I slipped out the door and hung the "Do Not Disturb" sign on the handle, knowing I'd be 10 minutes tops.

For anyone who has done it, buying a pregnancy test is kind of the worst. Not only do you have the stress of the results on your mind but you have that awkward moment with the cashier where you are trying to avoid their eye contact at all cost. Of course during the couple times I've done it, I always buy gum or something and pretend like, 'yeah, it's the gum I came here for and oh, I guess I'll pick up a Clear Blue as well but only since I'm already here.'

Anyway, I wish I could say I went straight back to the hotel to check on my sleeping baby, but instead I anxiously paced up and down the street in the pouring rain, like in a pathetic chick flick kind of way, until I summoned enough courage to take the test. By the time I got back to our room, I was soaking wet, like submerged myself in a tank of water kind of drenched. River was still sleeping like an angel.

I dried off, gave myself a pep talk and took the test. It didn't even take 30 seconds to show that I was pregnant. I kid you not, I just laughed. And laughed. And laughed. I laughed hysterically and uncontrollably for I don't know how long, but several minutes. In the moment, I didn't really feel anything but shock. It is not that I didn't want to be pregnant because I did but I wasn't expecting it that soon, like not even close. River was still under a year so the idea of them being super close, while awesome, was extremely overwhelming.

Wayne got back and I told him the news. He had a very similar reaction to mine: shock but happy above all. (All the while, River continued to nap which was perfect).

Now when I look back at all these memories, it makes me smile knowing it was my best little bud, Wolfie with me all along.

We were checking out of the hotel that day, so we packed up our stuff and got a couple's massage in the hotel spa for Wayne's birthday which I already had planned. Of course I quickly realized I wasn't supposed to get a massage in the first trimester, but I told the masseuse to go super light and it ended up being easygoing and a well-needed stress relief.

Finding out I was pregnant shaped my mindset for the rest of the tour. I was so overjoyed but my carefree attitude was now strained. I had already toured while pregnant with River and it was difficult on me physically, plus that was when I didn't have another child to care for. On top of that, I probably should have gone to a random doctor just to confirm everything but I could tell I was pregnant and there wasn't that much that they would tell me except to take my vitamins. I ended up waiting until we were back home to see my doctor and if I remember right, I was already almost 4 months along at that point. But all and all, the traveling worked out, besides some nausea and being overly tired...oh, and having to buy all new pants.

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